If you haven’t checked out Twitter lately, here are a few Powerball tweets you’ll find to be hilarious to make your day.
If you’re a regular fan of late-night television, then you’ve probably watched an episode or two of Jimmy Fallon. And in one of his comedy-induced sketches, he featured a full roster of hilarious tweets rooted in a Powerball hashtag that will certainly brighten your day. You’re guaranteed to giggle at least a little at these funny responses that everyday Americans shared involving how they’d spend their Powerball jackpots.
One person tweeted about her college debt being the first to go should she ever win the Powerball jackpot. “I would pay off my college debt,” she said, “and then go buy a pack of gum with what’s leftover.”
One contributor to this hashtag thread and Jimmy Fallon sketch is clearly an NBA fan with a sense of humor. “I would buy a new basketball team in Miami,” the tweet begins and goes on to say, “and I’d call them “Humidity” so I could say, “it’s not the Heat, it’s the Humidity.”
Another hilarious tweet happened to be Jimmy Fallon’s own dream way to spend a Powerball jackpot. He said, “I’d rent out an IKEA,” but it’s what he’d do next that fans found hilarious. “And [I’d] sleep in a different display bedroom every night,” Fallon tweeted.
Chris Hobbs tweeted a Powerball jackpot-funded wish come true about Morgan Freeman. “I would pay Morgan Freeman to narrate my life,” Dobbs said. Imagine Morgan Freeman’s iconic voice saying the following statements for a good laugh, “Chris woke up at noon today. He’s thinking about making a sandwich.”
Shannon tweeted about her Powerball jackpot dream of designing windshield wipers that “don’t miss that little triangle at the bottom of the window.” And we’re all applauding her for that suggestion.
One of the most hilarious Powerball tweets comes from Joel, who seems to be quite the realistic pessimist about what he’d do upon winning the Powerball jackpot. Joel tweeted, “Let’s be honest. I’d just complain about the taxes.”
One dad knew exactly what he’d do with his Powerball jackpot win. And he’s pretty funny about how he’d go about protecting his daughter. “Hire UFC women to follow my daughter for the next 20 years,” he said. And his tweet goes on, “And kick the crap out of any men that talk to her.”
Another tweet harkens back to the days of MC Hammer. And James Arseneau tweeted that if he were to win the Powerball jackpot, he would “buy all of MC Hammer’s stuff and touch it all!”
Rylee takes her Powerball jackpot wish list to a whole new level. And for anyone who resents raisins in their cookies, this tweet’s for you. She says, “I’d hire someone to take small bites of chocolate chip cookies, just to make sure they weren’t raisin cookies in disguise.”
Amber might be speaking to the lazy side of all of us when she shared what she’d do if a Powerball jackpot came her way. She tweeted, “I would quit my job and be a full-time Netflix binger.” She went on to talk about what such a lifestyle would entail, including “I could travel to different parts of my house and everything.”
Tanisha takes a hilarious approach to spending her dream Powerball fortune and clearly wants everyone to laugh at her jokes. She tweeted, “I’d pay a man to follow me [around] and play the Seinfeld bass riff every time I made a joke.”
If you need a pick-me-up for your day, check out the #IfIWonThePowerball thread and keep reading. You might even be inspired right now to go out and pick up a Powerball ticket for yourself!